In this episode, the actor, musician, and writer Nico Tortorella to talk about everything from why this is the most nervous Ive ever been for an interview; to how he discovered songwriting during his wifes pregnancy. We discuss my journey with Nicos work and why his book, Space Between: Explorations of Love, Sex, and Fluidity deeply moved me, how challenging it was for him to write the book, and how his views on gender have expanded since having a child. He shares how he was raised regarding queerness, how his and his wifes monogamy has organically taken shape since having their child, and what it was like having a profound home birth experience. He also talks about his views on approaching gender conversations in households, his ten-year sobriety from alcohol, on allowing ourselves and others permission to change our minds, and much more.

The Mattachine Family, now available on digital platforms, is a feel-good comedy-drama about gay photographer Thomas (Nico Tortorella) choosing the family he wants. It goes beyond having married his husband, Oscar (Juan Pablo Di Pace), or having supportive friends Leah (Emily Hampshire), her partner Sonia (Cloie Wyatt Taylor), and Jamie (Jake Choi); its about having a child. After Thomas and Oscar foster Arthur (Matthew Jacob Ocampo) for a year, Thomas is bereft when Arthur is returned to his birth mother. While Oscar, a former child actor, takes a job in Michigan, Thomas mopes around L.A. trying to find purpose in his life. He is wary about being a dad again, but he also wants to fill the void Arthur created.

This warm film, directed by Andy Vallentine and written by his husband Danny Vallentine (based on their experiences), deftly examines gay parenthood from various angles, including surrogacy and fertility clinics. The films bittersweet nature as Thomas poignant voiceovers and photographs consider what family and friends mean will melt the hearts of sentimental viewers.

The nonbinary Tortorella spoke with Philadelphia Gay News about making the film and being a parent.

The Mattachine Family addresses identity politics coming out, being gay, as well as the politics of being a gay husband and a father. Can you talk about what being queer means to both you and your character, Thomas?
This movie came across my desk at a time when my partner and I were trying to get pregnant, and we were dealing with infertility for just about a year when I got this script. The ways my wife and I were going about trying to create life may, on paper, seem traditional, but given our relationship and who we are, it was very queer to us. We understand not everyone would see it that way. Getting this script at that time was one of those art imitating life moments. So much of myself and my current experiences were in this script. Theres a line, What does it mean to be a gay parent? and I posed that question to the Vallentines, as they were dealing with their own fertility [issues] and their own journey [to parenthood]. We had this conversation about creating life at a time when life seemed most fragile. Our experiences were more similar than different. For both myself and Thomas, we are dealing with the unconventional and the nontraditional. Every parent has a different journey bringing a child into the world, whether they are straight, gay, or anything in between. I was excited to bring a piece of myself to the story and to better understand what it meant to be a gay father through Thomas.

Read the full interview at Philadelphia Gay News

For Nico Tortorella, starring in The Mattachine Family was more than just a job it was therapy.

Directed by Andrew Vallentine, the film follows Thomas (Tortorella) and Oscar (Juan Pablo Di Pace), a happily married gay couple who find themselves at a crossroads after their first foster child returns to his birth mother. Thomas initially somewhat disinterested in parenthood grapples with saying goodbye which leads him to realize how much he wants to be a father. Oscar, meanwhile, finds himself more focused on his budding career.

It is a personal story of Vallentines, born out of real conversations the director had with his own husband around fatherhood and what it looks like for two gay men. Tortorella also found himself surprisingly drawn to Thomas story, if not for a slightly different reason; it allowed him to process the infertility struggles he was facing with his wife, Bethany Meyers.

I read the script and it was really emotional for me. I saw so much of myself in this story. My own experience, my own journey, Tortorella, 35, exclusively told Us Weekly while discussing the film. And at home I was the rock in so many ways, just having to hold down the fort while Bethany was able to experience the emotional upheaval of infertility. I was very much the big picture dreamer. Like, Its going to happen no matter what. No questions asked. And when I got onto set for this movie, I was able to experience everything that I was closeting, so to speak, at home. I got to cry like over and over and over again and long for this spirit of this child that I had been channeling for the last year plus.

Read the full interview at Us Magazine

As Wilmette-born actor Nico Tortorella and his partner were trying to have their first baby, he was getting ready to make a queer indie film with fatherhood at its center.

The Mattachine Family, available for sale or rent Tuesday on streaming platforms, shares the story of a gay couple dealing with loss after their foster child is returned to his birth mother.

Thomas and Oscar played by Tortorella and Juan Pablo Di Pace adjust in different ways, with Oscar diving into his career and moving to Michigan to film a new show while Tortorellas character struggles to figure out whats next.

Tortorella said working on the film was a healing experience that taught him about parenthood. Tortorellas first child was born in 2023, and the couple recently announced theyre expecting another.

There was some divine timing in action here, Tortorella said. And I am forever grateful. Thomas prepared me in so many ways to be a father.

Read the full interview at Sun-Times

Done and Up Nico Tortorella – Official Music Video

Thomas and Oscar are a gay couple very much in love, but after their first foster child returns to his birth mother, they find they have different ideas about what it means to make a family.Coming June 4th 2024.

Last Summer Nico Tortorella – Official Music Video

He Said She Said Nico Tortorella – Official Music Video